Our First Nigerian Wedding

Hi Everyone,
It is seven o'clock in the evening here in Nigeria and we arrived home from our first Nigerian wedding about two hours ago. I'm going to take you through a very typical village wedding. I'm hoping just to show you exactly (as we saw it) the day, without too much editorializing. Stephen, an elder at our ECWA church was marrying Esther and the invitation said 10 o'clock. Now, in Nigeria NOTHING starts on time (they even joke about it) so we knew we shouldn't get there right at ten...but American habits die hard so the first picture is of Crist and I as we're heading out to the wedding. How about that fancy hat ladies?? We arrived at ten and the second picture shows you the empty church when we arrived. In fact, they were still hanging balloons and the band was practicing. We sat and we sat.

The band began playing at around 11:15 (very lively music and LOUD) and the church began filling up.....and filling up.....and filling up. All the children were told to go outside and probably when the wedding started at 11:30 or so (yes, 1 1/2 hours late) there were three hundred people inside the church and another hundred or so outside the church. The normal way the wedding party comes into the church is by DANCING. The groomsmen (ten or eleven) come shuffling in, followed by various family groups (you can tell because their clothing is made from the same material, but with different styles), and various church groups etc.

The picture to the right is of the groomsmen coming down the aisle. Then six little girls all dressed in pink come dancing down after them (I mean really dancing!!). Then the eleven bridesmaid and then some more family groups follow. The bride walks herself down the aisle (or should I say "dances herself down the aisle.") without accompaniment. The mothers and fathers of the bride and groom don't have a special part, so I was never sure which couples they were. There were about 7 or 8 pastors up front and for the first few minutes, it's very official - signing of documents etc. Then various church choirs sang songs, the wedding vows were said and the exchange of rings (similar to what we do in the states) and all the pastors praying. Next came a twenty minute sermon (which was very good - he spoke on "the two becoming one flesh." Then an offering was taken, another prayer and everyone began to leave the church. It's now 1:30 in the afternoon and Crist and I haven't eaten anything since 7 in the morning, plus we haven't gone to the bathroom.

Once everyone got outside, they just stood around talking and taking pictures. We probably had at least an hour wait before we rode over to the reception area (at a nearby hotel).

It is now 2:30 and people are streaming into the reception area which is held totally outside. There are tents all over (kind of in a horseshoe circle) and for the next hour there is an MC who introduces various people and dignitaries of the village. The bride and groom arrive and almost immediately the band begins playing and they have Stephen and Esther in the middle of the semi-circle and they begin to do a kind of shuffle style Nigerian dance and people begin to crowd around them throwing money at them. (not big bills - mostly ten and twenty Niara bills - which are the equivelent of 7 cents and 14 cents). About every ten minutes or so, they dance some more and more money is thrown at them. I would imagine that by the end of the day, they have acquired several hundreds of dollars. In between, Stephen and Esther cut the cake, then dance some more.

The picture right below is of Crist throwing money at Esther while she is dancing by herself and the men are supposed to throw money. I would imagine most of the people in the village are at the reception and everyone seems to be really enjoying themselves. Stephen asked me to be "The Honorary Mother" since his mom is passed away and that means at the reception I have to say some encouraging words.

This last picture is of me talking to Stephen and Esther with my "encouraging words". I very briefly gave them three gifts of "Faith, Love and Joy". I was nervous and everyone was talking so I doubt if Esther and Stephen heard a word I said, but that's okay - I said what I felt the Lord wanted me to say.

Crist and I left the reception at 4:30 (still having nothing to eat or not going to the bathroom) and arrived home at 5 o'clock. Whew! It was a LONGGGGG day....but we experienced our first wedding here. It was a very joyous occasion, lots of dancing and music - but for us "old folks", we're really tired. Well, I have chatted long enough. Hope you enjoyed the wedding!

In-joy,

Eileen and Crist